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could a 15 year old handle a visit to her mom in jail?

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    1927

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    Sep 28, 2016
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    Mississippi
    since there was an off topic section here I thought I would ask to see anonymous opinions and maybe people have experience in law enforcement


    my wife will soon be entering county jail for seven months for a forgery charge. . I am willing to stick by her and not leave her because I feel She made some stupid mistakes but it was out of character so I think she just got herself into a bad situation and make some poor decisions. And I am not defending her or saying she should not serve her punishment. I told my kids she is rightfully serving her punishment which is the right thing for her mistakes. I am wondering what is the best way to prepare for this situation and how to handle it. I have a daughter who is 15 and she seems to be handling it fine. I told her right away about it and she reacted pretty calmly. She later joked about how her mother is "getting ordered around now". I think it is just a joke and I think it is better to be that way instead of being hysterical about it . I was originally not going to let her visit her mom in jail because I would think exposing her to that environment is not a good idea but I am actually hearing that it is a good idea to let her visit but why? isn't it a bad idea to let a 15 year old be exposed to a jail. She could easily be intimidated by the guards and inmates and just the area. My wife says bring her if she wants to visit but don't if she doesn't. She says she doesn't have a problem visiting but I am not sure.




    Even I find the jail environment to be intimidating. If I do, how can a 15 year old handle it?
     
    RG43

    RG43

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    Jun 24, 2016
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    There is a lot at play here for your daughter. At 15, she is both grown up and still a child. It's a difficult time, even if she "seems fine". There are things that can surface later if not now, regarding how she feels both about her mother's actions and separation from her. Frankly, nobody here is likely going to give you the best answers, if only because we can't be there to evaluate, and also because it's unlikely any of us are really qualified to give such advice. A professional child psychologist who has had a chance to evaluate your daughter and the circumstances might be more qualified. But ultimately, it's up to you and her and maybe some input from other close family or reasonable substitutes (god parent, for instance). The bottom line here is your first responsibility is to do the best for your daughter. She is the one really looking at the biggest long term effect in all this, not just whether she visits her mother but in dealing with what her mother has done and how she will reconcile with her daughter after her absence. The fact is, the biggest issue here is her mother wasn't being a good parent, she didn't put her status as a parent first, by virtue of the fact she did something that would potentially (and did) separate her from her daughter. That fact alone has consequences, and it will fall on all of you to recognize that and address it. Be careful when you say, "she seems to be handling it fine". That may be true for now, but keep aware that it can change for her, and affect her more than it seems to now.
     
    W

    Whitebread

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    Aug 3, 2015
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    I've been to the camps in Angola. It's probably a little tougher place than your wife is going, and there was nothing there that if I had a 15 year old son, I would be uncomfortable with him seeing. But they were all strangers to me, so taking your daughter to see her mom may be a different thing entirely. Let her decide and go from there.
     
    rtr_rtr

    rtr_rtr

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    Dec 24, 2011
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    I think it would be better for her to visit and maintain contact with her mom. There's nothing about a prison that would be scarring to a 15 year old. She's 15 though, I'd just invite her whenever you go and let her make her own decision

    DAVE_M said:
    Dude shows up and asks what's a good gun to get, then if he can have it if his wife is a criminal, and now asking parental advice.
    Click to expand...

    And?
     
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