Permissible Fireworks

[Cat]

I did this to a Bull when I was a kid. Hilarious!!!After it took out the fence and ran onto International Paper( that was ready to cut) it was still a little funny. But when we saw the flames about an hour later...... Not funny!!!!!!! 3600 acres of pines went up in smoke. Bad thing was that summer we were in one of the worst droughts in history.

The only reason that I'm sharing this is that the Statute of Limitation is up on the "Destruction of Property" charge that it could carry. Funny thing two weeks later that Bull showed back up in the pasture and he still had that Roman Candle tied to his tail!!!!!!! He wouldn't let us get within 100 feet of him to try and get that thing untied.

I love fire. I love fire on a very dangerous, seductive scale. She sings to me. My parents have WAY too many stories of how I nearly burned down the house, the back yard, behind the pond, another house (twice), this house (thrice).

In fact last week Jody just threw a temper tantrum that I swear consisted of "You don't get to play with fire ever again! This is my torch. You can't play with my torch. You're not allowed to touch fire." I just kind of looked behind me at the amassed garage full of glass. "Okay, you're not allowed to play with fire except that fire. You can't touch my torch." So I reminded him of all the fine silver that I had JUST ordered to start soldering projects. "You're not allowed to use fire inside the house." "I'll help you."

All because I burned a pair of leads to his multimeter. Sheesh! I wrapped the damned things in electric tape. They should be good to go again. He didn't see the humor in my attempt at helping.

 

[GunRelated]

Cat ask this guy if it's a good idea.

http://www.wwltv.com/news/local/jefferson/Kenner-man-taken-to-hospital-after-sparkler-bomb-explodes-in-his-hand-161363175.html

Why in the hell would he try to remove the lit fuse? Why would the sparkler bomb even be in his hand when he lit it? Sparkler bombs are serious ****, you don't handle them like a black cat.

 

[Bayoupiper]

I would shoot the person that tied a bottle rocket to my cat's tail!!!!



































Not really, just following the latest BS.com trend......

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[Cat]

I did this to a Bull when I was a kid. Hilarious!!!After it took out the fence and ran onto International Paper( that was ready to cut) it was still a little funny. But when we saw the flames about an hour later...... Not funny!!!!!!! 3600 acres of pines went up in smoke. Bad thing was that summer we were in one of the worst droughts in history.

The only reason that I'm sharing this is that the Statute of Limitation is up on the "Destruction of Property" charge that it could carry. Funny thing two weeks later that Bull showed back up in the pasture and he still had that Roman Candle tied to his tail!!!!!!! He wouldn't let us get within 100 feet of him to try and get that thing untied.

That's also why we didn't buy any this year. I thought about smoke bombs for the boy, but it didn't happen.

Guess I should also clarify I love playing with fire. I don't enjoy burning things down.

 

[Bayoupiper]

That's also why we didn't buy any this year. I thought about smoke bombs for the boy, but it didn't happen.

Guess I should also clarify I love playing with fire. I don't enjoy burning things down.

Cat's new avatar:

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[bigjakewelch]

That's also why we didn't buy any this year. I thought about smoke bombs for the boy, but it didn't happen.

Guess I should also clarify I love playing with fire. I don't enjoy burning things down.

I'm not much on burning stuff down either. Hence the OMG moment when I see the 2000lb bull in the field a couple of weeks later!!! With the evidence still attached to his tail!!! We chased that thing around for hours. The whole time my Grandpa was sitting on the back porch drinking his coffee watching us. When we finally removed the evidence and went back to the house he asked me if I was going to play with that bull anymore. My answer was "What Bull?" "If you ain't got pictures it never happened."

 

[Cat]

Cat's new avatar:

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Man, if you want to set my mama off, ask her about my firebug tendencies. HOLY COW! You'd think after 32 years she'd have forgotten the time I tossed a bag of fireworks into our fireplace. I was pissed. I didn't want to clean up my mess. The trash can was twenty feet too far. She was upset, but the resulting display sucked me it. That was my introduction to fire. That same year we were selling the house, same scenario and I didn't want to carry my little bag of trash downstairs to the kitchen trash can. So I snuck downstairs, snitched my mama's cigarette lighter and burned my trash in my little aluminum Bambi trash can. Did you know if carpet gets hot enough, it melts. Right smack in the middle of the room. Unexpected replacement fees do come up during selling of one's home. If that woman had quit smoking, we would have had a much safer home. Really.

Or the time I accidentally (and I swear to god it was an accident) dropped a mortar shell in with the bag of lots of other mortar shells, when it was surrounded by several people. Old people can haul ass.

Or when I slung precisely timed bottle rockets off Dad's skeet shooter. Beautiful. You never knew which direction they would go. We'd take bets before we were shut down. Dad never did appreciate the timing that took!

But the real deal breaker. The one that shut me down under the pain of death while I was still living at home was when I discovered hair spray was flammable. I liked big hair, I was in high school and had amassed a nice selection of different hair sprays. The one girlfriend that was right there with me through all of these adventures, even when I was four, helped me. She'd light the cigarette lighter (see, she should have quit) and I'd hold down the nozzle. It… Was… Fine… Until Mom opened the door and saw a ten foot flame end about six inches from her face.

She was so shocked she couldn't even yell very well. She'd start, get that blank "I thought I had seen it all" expression and fluff up like a pissed off chicken before walking off.

I was Jody's problem before I could do anything else.

I don't know when, but it was during a point while my back was turned but my parents powwowed with my future husband and gave him a laundry list of instructions. Married 16 years and I still haven't been able to light the first firework. But they set me up with a dual fuel torch and passes me a MAPP gas torch last week. My parents are just as encouraging with this hobby.

It's a whole host of other times, 18 years of fireworks twice a year, I've forgotten some I'm sure.

But I think Jake's bull story is much more epic. And hysterical, in a not-3600 acres kind of way.

 

[McMedic]

 

[Cat]

I'm not much on burning stuff down either. Hence the OMG moment when I see the 2000lb bull in the field a couple of weeks later!!! With the evidence still attached to his tail!!! We chased that thing around for hours. The whole time my Grandpa was sitting on the back porch drinking his coffee watching us. When we finally removed the evidence and went back to the house he asked me if I was going to play with that bull anymore. My answer was "What Bull?" "If you ain't got pictures it never happened."

I'm dying here. ROFL

 

[charlie12]

He's a couple more smart guys. Well one's dead.

http://www.wafb.com/story/18953606/teenager-killed-in-fireworks-accident